"Detox" isn't my term. My friend came up with it when I tweeted about what I am going to do this week.
I am "Detoxing" my home of distractions and objects that separate me from my children. Things that cause us to argue and not accomplish what we should.
I have cleaned up ALL of Madelynn's toys. I put them in boxes, baskets, and bags. I placed those in a closet and locked it. The only things I left out are Madelynn's books and her Easel. All of Hayleigh's toys are still out but Madelynn knows she is not to play with them.
I am setting the parental controls on my Blu-ray player so that for any movie to be played I have to type in a code.
My computer and laptop will not be turned on or used by me between the hours of 7am and 8pm(or bedtime).
My phone will only be used for important conversations, important texts, and myfitnesspal. I will use no other features between the time of 7am and 8pm.
This week rather than playing on the computer, I will read to my children.
Rather than sitting Madelynn in front of the television so I can get stuff done, I will have her right next to me helping me do my house work. I know it will take longer but it will be worth it.
Rather than telling Madelynn to play doll house so I can get "just one more" post written or email answered, I will do a craft with Madelynn.
Rather than checking my Facebook page to see who commented or posted something, I will help Hayleigh learn to stand at her activity table or crawl.
I am replacing distractions and objects with actions and memories.
Somewhere along the line I lost track. I am going to fix that.
This week is going to be hard on me. That alone is a sad sad statement. It should not be hard on me to properly mother my children. I shouldn't be wondering how I'm going to get through this. This should all be normal for me. It used to be normal for me.
After this week is over I will add things back in. But not to the extreme that they were. I will work harder at this. Not for myself but for my children. They need me to be their mother. Not just some lady that does the basic things then distracts them with inanimate objects so I "can get something done". I should be down there in the floor playing with them every minute that I can. Doing every craft that I can. Baking together whenever we feel they urge. They are only little for so long. I will have all the time I could ever imagine when they are grown. I need to spend my time wisely now.
Will you join me? Will you "Detox" your home of the distractions for just one week? Will you bring yourself back to the mother you know you can be?
Please read THIS follow up post for more understanding.
honestly I do not see the point of this, yes you want to do things with your children but as much as you want them to know that you are there for them they need to learn to entertain themselves and that the world is not catered to making them happy. some parents have to work while their kids are awake and their kids turn out just fine without constant parental stimulation. do what you want but there will be no detox in my house although I don't use the tv and computer as much as it sounds like you do. Have you thought about cutting back without cutting it all out? Is it really doing you any good to go from one extreme to the other?
ReplyDeleteIf you even receive this go check out my follow up post. I think you will better understand what I am doing.
Deletehttp://www.inthemommybusiness.com/2012/01/let-me-just-clarify.html
I am looking forward to starting my own 'detox' tomorrow morning! I will be doing it a bit differently (I don't think I'll pack up all dd's toys etc, as she is in school during the day and I am looking forward to playing WITH her after school), but I will be turning the laptop off between 7:30am and 7:30pm along with the tv. My dd is 6 (ds is only 2months) and is perfectly capable of entertaining herself; I don't really think that is the point. I look at it as making sure the time I spend with the kids is time that I am fully present (and you cannot be fully present if you are checking email or watching a show at the same time as talking to your kids). This is one week, not a lifetime of entertaining my kids :) I think I'll be a better mom and my dd especially will benefit from knowing I am really here for her. I'm glad I read this - and good luck!
ReplyDeleteI have been inspired by this idea, though I have thought about it before I have never taken action. Eliza's post came at just the right time. Like Jana, I won't be taking away off of the toys, I don't think that would work for my 3 year old, but I did organize them (again) and move some from the living room to his bedroom. I also have a baby (11 months) so there will be times I need one or the other to be entertained so I can care for the other.
ReplyDeleteMy 3 year old is also VERY good at entertaining himself, which is probably why I feel the need for change. It's easy to allow him to play by himself and get things done around the house.
We started today by taking out son to the Science Centre (my MIL kindly spent some time with the baby) for the first time. He LOVED it! We saw a whole new excitement, our usually quiet boy was screeching with excitement! We are all pooped and he has been going on and on about everything he did today.
I am looking forward to more special days not only this week but for as long as he wants to hang out with us.
As for the first reply, I think going all in to start and making a drastic change is a great way to make a change. You can see the rewards right away and then work out the balance of the less important tasks as you go. :) Thank you for the motivation and good luck to everyone who is making this change! :)
I personally think it's a brilliant idea. I will be doing the same, but like previous posters won't be taking away toys. Almost all of my sons toys are skill building/learning toys and we play with them together. My biggest thing is reading to him, I used to read 6-8 books a day to him, and now he's lucky to get one. So more power to parents who want to be more interactive with their kids.
ReplyDeleteEliza, I recieved some of the same negative responses when we did our detox the first time. Be assured that those who know you know that you are a great mother and that M is a very balanced child. Love ya.
ReplyDeleteSimplify and you will be blessed.
ReplyDeleteAmen to that!
DeleteI hear ya! It is too easy to zone out when tired, overwhelmed, patience running low, chores need doing, or any of a multitude of things a mom faces throughout the day. It is too easy to forget the thing that matters most - quality time with our children. I admire you for your decision to 'detox'. I know you and your family will be blessed beyond measure. allthingszoo.blogspot.com
ReplyDeleteI will totally be doing this. My son is in school during the mornings so it will be a little different for me too. But the big thing will be no TV or video games.
ReplyDelete